(Day 0+3)
Before leaving for Moscow there was a lot to do and I mean a lot to do. Preparing physically and emotionally for the idea of where I was going and what I was about to put my body through was one of the toughest things I've ever had to do.. Add on top of that packing for Moscow and being in hospital then that was just huge!
The other major thing I had to wrap my head around was leaving home for 5+ weeks.. Leaving my children was an unbearable thought that I tried not to think about very much as the slightest thought of it brought me to tears. My kids aren't babies either and are gorgeous well adjusted young children (well I think so!). They know exactly what is happening and want this for our family as much as we all do. When Isabelle (13) saw Kristy Cruise on 60 minutes her reaction was "Mum, you've so got to do that!). Seb (10) thinks about things a bit more scientifically and wanted to know the whole process but also came to the same conclusion.
I don't really think of myself as an organised person but I do often get told that I am - I think my head is often scrambled but what comes out at the other end is quite often the organised result I'm after..
So for me, as my family & friends will probably attest, I'm quite anal and opinionated and like things done 'my way'. Now I know they love me just the way I am but we all have our little idiosyncrasies don't we that are just a tiny bit infuriating to others but they just make us the person that we are, yes/no??
Mum and Dad had been over for a few days before their European adventure and spent some time learning the ropes, driving kids, schedules etc... And I also had a booklet for them, especially needed since we had a 2 day gap between changeover filled with spreadsheets on school activities, kids activities, calendars, lunches, jobs to be done, music lessons, music exams, contacts for friends and schools. And of course I made sure that I had copies of these so I could keep a track of things as they happened here, as if they wouldn't be able to cope without me being able to keep my finger on the pulse.
Well, let me tell you I think all my over organising was definitely a good thing and everything has gone to plan at home but as for me getting involved from here, not so much at all. I've let go, for once in my life I think I've let go and it's a good thing!
I've found that my complete focus is on me. I miss home and the kids terribly but I realise that the most important job for me right now is the make sure that I'm taking part in this journey completely and giving myself the best opportunity to become the best person of myself that I can once more be!
My parents are doing an amazing job with my children and I don't know how I will every be able to repay them - well I do know actually as all they really want is a healthy me and I'm working hard at that!
As Dr Fedorenko has told me the key to "our success" Natalie....
GOOD FOOD, GOOD MOOD AND GOOD REHABILITATION... And I will be following this Amazing Doctors orders!!
Not sure I can follow up all that with any tidbits on ISO Day 2.. It's really the routine.. Fluids, Bloods, track levels, all going the right way, vodka bath, eat well - drool over any pictures I see on social media that involve food and imagine what I'm going to eat when I get home. Read a bit and watch tv.
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| Market shopping |
Not quite my usual SATC quote but my friend shared this with me yesterday and I loved it, hope you don't mind me sharing Brad x
Invictus
BY WILLIAM ERNEST HENLEY
Out of the night that covers me,Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.
In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.
Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds and shall find me unafraid.
It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate,
I am the captain of my soul.
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